Confession: I give wayyy too many!!
My next three blogposts will concern the topic of Trying to Be a Better Me – all about the three main ways that I believe will most improve my life and well-being. Why three? Because it’s a great number with magical memory-related properties. 😀
Let’s kickstart this with the one that I find the MOST difficult:
- the subtle art of not giving a fuck.
I’m not a swearer. My real-life persona (or ‘brand’ if you will) seems to be a sweet innocent girl who only says nice (& maybe awkward) things. A few years ago I shocked someone by wearing a Slytherin scarf because she simply could not see any associations between me and the perceivedly darker Hogwarts house. But in order to break out of your shell, you’ve got to just think ‘fuck it’ sometimes! Agh, I feel uncomfortable, maybe I should just say ‘frick’ instead…
Fear of a name only increases fear of the thing itself. So fuck it.
It seems to me that a large aspect of not giving a fuck is occupying a more chill mindset. My natural mindset tends to be more of the anxious and scared kind. And this is exactly how I let fear control me! To take back control I need to take life’s challenges way less seriously, and say fuck it more often. Fuck. It! Fuuuck iiit. Well, it’s easier for me to type than to say out loud, anyways.
The whole idea of saying F it more often hit me like a ton of bricks when I watched the YouTuber Jim Chapman’s video on the topic. I remember feeling like, wow, this is amazing, I’m going to change my life by applying this from now on! …the video was around 2013, I think. (He seems to have since removed the video, maybe due to demonetisation..?) Fast forward and, goddamn, here I am having to remind myself that, oh yes, this is something good that I really should apply to my life. Why’s it gotta be so hard? (…probably because nothing worthwhile comes easy.)
I need to work hard to care for myself by always reminding myself of this. Doing what scares you is GOOD for you. EMBRACE THE UNCOMFORTABLENESS! It is what makes you HUMAN and enables your GROWTH, which is a beautiful thing. Apologies for overdoing the caps here.
To make the most of your time here on beautiful earth, do one thing everyday that scares you, as said the wonderfully wise Eleanor Roosevelt.
Steps to achieving goal of giving less fucks:
Say it out loud: I don’t give a flying fuck what people think of me anymore. I will do whatever makes me smile, because I love myself and I am my first priority.
Note to self: DON’T give any actual fucks next week when I start the induction week of my law degree. Enjoy it, even! Don’t take any second of it too seriously! It’ll be over before you know it; in fact, this whole year will be over before I know it, and I’ll have to get a bloody job then. So I want to try and act like the whole thing is a bit of a laugh, a comedy, a bit of entertainment to keep me occupied. I don’t want to force any expectations of how it should go, or how I think it’ll go, in terms of who I will meet and what I will say and what I will be feeling. There is NO pressure that I need to do anything out of this world. I will just go with it.
Will update you on how that goes. ❤
*Hermione never actually said ‘so fuck it’, but I’m sure she was thinking it.
edit: i have changed the title to say ‘frick’ instead of ‘fuck’ because the latter word in a title of mine feels far too abrasive and just wrong x